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So I went running around today on my last day off and looked at houses for the hell of it. It's merely a pipe dream to think of actually owning a house that I can call home. Years ago, a marriage brought all kinds of hopeful possibilities, a house, a family, all that fairy tale crap that people think about. It didn't happen, no kids, no house, and certainly no fairy tale to speak of these days. So now, my work, my job, and the mailman delivering bills seems to define my life and who I am. My hobby is yet another definition of me, but it's not my life as I thought it once was either. The hobby is good, would be better if I wasn't all sicky-poo with Mono. Yeah, feeling a little frustrated these days when all I seem to do is screw things up and have nothing much to show for it. Although I love my job still, there are days that the things I love about it also drag me down. I hope it's merely the Mono giving me second thoughts, the job keeps me entirely too busy and does not allow for enough down time to relax and recover before starting all over the next day. At the same time, the job keeps me moving, busy, and spent by the end of the day and I like it for that too, just not while bouting with icky Mono. ARRG! Oh well, done ranting now..... No more ranting today, it's time for a nap.

T~

...So if I die today I'll be the happy phantom
And I'll go wearin' my naughties like a jewel...
I'm still an angel to a girl who hates to sin